I wanted to take time to honestly answer this question. Many people ask us this, and it is hard to explain in short so I’ll do my best to give a longer answer here. Even if you don’t know me well, if you have read a few of my blog posts you’ve probably figured out that I’m more of a raw person, cut to the chase and be real. For those of you who understand this phraseology: I prefer the Hebron way…blunt.

Burundi is a tough country to live in. It is one of the most densely populated countries in the entire world (Worldbank). Around 6% of the population has access to electricity and extremely limited access to clean water and sanitation. In most cases you will find statistics saying it is the poorest or one of the poorest countries in the world (worldatlas)

So, what does that have to do with how our boys are doing? It’s really hard to grasp their struggles without attempting to understand the culture they’re in. It is very difficult for them to have real friendships or honestly even kids to just play with. There is obviously the language barrier which we are improving on, but far from being fluent. The kids they are playing with have toys they have made out of trash usually. Even their soccer ball is usually plastic bags rolled up. To play with a soccer ball is a huge blessing to these kids and our boys do well at understanding and engaging with them.

There are zero westerners around us. We can easily count on 1 hand the number of white people we have seen in 5 months (minus the team that came in August). This means you are a novelty, your white skin is intriguing to them and most of what they know about the white people is they dress nice, they have nice things and they have a TON of money compared to nearly every Burundian they have ever met. That means, when we go to town every single time we are stared at, we are followed, we are yelled to “muzungu!” (white person), we are constantly hearing “give me” (the only English they know), and we are given what we call the muzungu price-white man price-which is always more than a Burundian would pay. I do not say this in any way to be complaining, I am simply trying to portray what a drive into town is like for us. There’s A LOT that happens.

So, imagine being a 6 year old boy and riding in the car to a local store. First of all, there aren’t too many other cars (because MOST of the population cannot afford a car), then you hear the entire 20 minute drive, “muzungu!”. Once you get to the store, usually just Josh goes in for us, and he is followed by at least 1 person (yesterday it was literally 7), and the rest of us sit in the car with the windows cracked as typically 3-10 people come up to try to sell us things or begging for money or food. “Ndashonje, mama, ndashonje” they say which means, I’m hungry, mama, I’m hungry. We can see their torn clothes, the same clothes they have had the last 5 months we’ve been here and we can see their scrawny bodies, the sadness and desperation in their eyes and we know if we give something that may be their only food of the day or longer. There’s so many. You have to learn to give discreetly and wisely, because your car will EASILY be surrounded in no time. If we do give, it is food or such a small amount of money, it would be insulting to an American beggar. They aren’t begging like people in America, they truly are starving and those trying to sell things to us know if they make this sale to the white people they could feed their family rice tonight. Most are not looking for money for drugs or alcohol, it’s actually pretty easy to tell those who are, and they are very few and far in between here. They’re looking for food, because they’re starving. Would you be excited to go to the store as a 6 year old? It’s a little overwhelming to say the least.

Another facet the boys have is even though they have some kids they love playing with to invite them over and inside our house is too much. The chasm is so wide. We are living in a beautiful, newly built guest house. I have no complaints at all with this house, it is wonderful. Again not complaining at all, trying to explain. It is very nice, and it is big because they do want teams and groups to stay here in the future. It is very, very nice for Burundi standards, it is quite basic for American standards. We have lights, faucets, a couch, a dining room table, we have a fridge, a stove, toilets, beds and mosquito nets. 94% of Burundians do not have access to electricity (Power Generation). About 1/3 of the population lacks access to safe, clean drinking water (Borgen Magazine). The orphanage we have talked to about needing a well, if it does not rain they do not have water, so the older kids wake up at 1am and walk to the river or a little further to a well to stand in line to get containers filled with water.

So, the kids the boys play with have no running water in their homes (have possibly never even seen running water in a home), do not have electricity in their homes, do not have a kitchen, do not have a fridge, do not have a stove, may not have a table, and do not have a couch or a bed. For them to walk into our home and see all these luxuries would be so overwhelming, and sadly may be temptation to covet or steal.

We have a house girl (very common in Burundi) and she helps with cleaning, laundry and dishes. She is 19 and had never seen a fridge or an oven (we have a small gas oven). I have not taught her to cook yet, but I will need to show her how an oven works because they usually cook over a fire.

There are many challenges to living in a third world country and living amongst the poorest of the poor. It is not easy. Our boys work through the challenges and struggles everyday. Some days are better than others. Some days the kids playing soccer are kind and they all play together, some days a kid may try to steal the ball, some days a child seems jealous and is mean to the white kids. Most days our boys play with each other wonderfully, and like every sibling that has ever walked the earth sometimes they just want to pummel each other. There are things they love about Burundi and the freedom they have here and there are things they hate about Burundi and they struggle.

So, as parents the answer we stand firm on is to the question we all consistently ask…..is it worth it? Yes. Did God call us here? Yes.

Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33. The rest of these boys lives they will have trouble, they will have trials of many kinds. Josh and I are so thankful for this year we have to struggle and rejoice as a family. We face hardships on every side. We have absolutely gotten to the point where we wanted to give up. But these moments and this squeezing are showing us what we really value and what really matters. I can honestly say for myself, I have cried over not having a hot shower or hot bath on more than one occasion. These are light and momentary troubles. They really are, and by God’s grace alone we continue to put one foot in front of the other and serve as a family.

We were recently in Kenya and got to spend time with my parents. There are struggles in transitioning back. Samuel was really struggling yesterday and I said, “Son, go serve someone!” That precious, sad boy moped to the fridge grabbed a Fanta and an apple and turned to walk outside. As he walked his demeanor slowly began changing. He handed our guard the Fanta and apple and Sam genuinely smiled because he saw our guards thankfulness and joy. Did it make Samuel not miss his grandparents? No. Did it bless him, bless our guard, and bless God by him doing something so simple when he didn’t feel like it? Yes.

These are the lessons we are learning deeply while in Burundi and in ways we don’t want to, but we know this is for our good and we believe for the good of our boys. Every day there are hundreds of things to be thankful for, and even our boys at young ages are seeing that daily in a whole new way BECAUSE they live in Burundi.

I think we have all become very creative while living here too. Simple things have become big deals. We make fun out of the simple now. The boys love making fires in the fire-pit, they love when the rains come and they play and get all muddy. The local store had balloons once and they made water balloons and had a blast for hours. They enjoy cutting down a tree and trying to build things from it (Josiah is working on a chair right now), or carving things with the wood. Josh and I have come up with fun games (usually Dude Perfect style!) and recently we made a normal movie night into a movie night brought to them by Studio Krumenacher. They will remember the difficulties of life here I’m sure, but I think we will all remember the fun we have too and the memories we have made together. The difficult, the good and the wonderful will shape our family and these boys for the better we believe.

So, to answer the question, “how are the boys doing?” They’re doing well!