I have a lot of favorite songs, I enjoy music in nearly every genre, yes, even country music. There is a song we often sing at church thats lyrics have been echoing in my mind these last days before departure.

Yet Not I But Through Christ In Me written by CityAlight

Verse 1
What gift of grace is Jesus my redeemer
There is no more for heaven now to give
He is my joy, my righteousness, and freedom
My steadfast love, my deep and boundless peace

Refrain 1
To this I hold, my hope is only Jesus
For my life is wholly bound to his
Oh how strange and divine, I can sing: all is mine!
Yet not I, but through Christ in me

Verse2
The night is dark but I am not forsaken
For by my side, the Saviour He will stay
I labour on in weakness and rejoicing
For in my need, His power is displayed

Refrain 2
To this I hold, my Shepherd will defend me
Through the deepest valley He will lead
Oh the night has been won, and I shall overcome!
Yet not I, but through Christ in me

Verse 3
No fate I dread, I know I am forgiven
The future sure, the price it has been paid
For Jesus bled and suffered for my pardon
And He was raised to overthrow the grave

Refrain 3
To this I hold, my sin has been defeated
Jesus now and ever is my plea
Oh the chains are released, I can sing: I am free!
Yet not I, but through Christ in me

Verse 4
With every breath I long to follow Jesus
For He has said that He will bring me home
And day by day I know He will renew me
Until I stand with joy before the throne

Refrain 4
To this I hold, my hope is only Jesus
All the glory evermore to Him
When the race is complete, still my lips shall repeat:
Yet not I, but through Christ in me!

As we embark on this new journey as a family I see my friends and family giving up something dear to them. I see my parents giving up birthdays, Christmas, sleepovers and just stopping to say hey to their 3 grandsons for the next year. That is a difficult thing to give up. I have loved the first verse and refrain realizing how much God the Father gave up in sending His One and Only Son. The greatest sacrifice has already been made and because of that sacrifice those who know Jesus including my parents and us can sing with joy through this sacrifice.

The second verse is possibly my favorite, because I can assure you we labor on in weakness. Many people put missionaries or pastors on a pedestal and that is such a wrong place to put anyone. We are human like the rest of mankind. We make mistakes, we have made mistakes and we will continue to make mistakes, we are laboring through this life in weakness, but there is also rejoicing when we remember what great love He has that in our need His power is displayed.

No fate I dread is the beginning of the third verse. Yes, there are dangers in life and life in Africa, but the greatest dread has been taken, I know I am forgiven! Whatever comes our way we can rejoice because our sin has been defeated. Through the deepest valleys He will lead us, He has the victory. Times have felt and will feel dark, difficult, painful and lonely, but the night has been won and we shall overcome yet not us but through Christ in us.

The last verse sums up our longing and our desire, with every breath we are longing to follow Jesus. We are messing up, we are imperfectly serving, but our desire is to follow hard after Him and Him alone.

He has walked with us already through the valley of the shadow of death and He will not abandon us now. He won’t abandon our family and friends as they grieve our departure and send us off in love, He won’t forsake us as we have ups and downs and all arounds. He has always been only faithful and forever He will be.

Yesterday morning I was discouraged and disgruntled to be honest. My focus was on the waves. Then God sent the perfect family to buy our van and we got to pray together, then He sent a friend who brought items for us that unbeknownst to her were literally the only items I was still hoping we could get, then we realized our friends who have been missionaries in Uganda are living across the hall and they spoke such encouragement to us. At the end of the day, my eyes were back on the One sovereign over the waves, and that could not be me, but Christ in me.

Please, be keeping us in your prayers as we finish our preparations and depart at the end of next week. We are probably 90 some percent excited and there is some bittersweet, the most for our boys I’m sure. It’s easier in a lot of ways for us who are going and it’s harder for those who are staying and have a sort of hole in their lives with our absence, will you please keep our close friends and family in your prayers too? We are so thankful for technology and the way we are able to Facetime, call and text unlike the old days when a written letter would take months to arrive from a loved one. Thank you for your faithful prayers and support!